Road Fud # 3: hangover chilli sans chilli

INGREDIENTS

* 1 can black beans
* 1 can kidney beans
* 1 can tomato paste and 1 cup water
          * OR *
* 1 can tomato sauce if it was in the cupboard like you swore it was while in the IGA back in town
* 1 package yves veggie ground round texturized vegetable protein
* 2 extra large full body hangovers, optional
* 1 yellow onion, diced
* 6 cloves garlic, diced
* 4 tablespoons olive oil
* 1 oz bitter chocolate
* 1 chipotle pepper, diced
* 1 teaspoon black pepper
* 3 bay leaves
* salt to taste

Cook onions in olive oil until sufficiently browned, then add garlic and cook until whenever.
Add veggie ground round and mix that around while you search for the chilli powder.
Add everything else in no particular order as you swear quietly about absence of chilli and tomato sauce.
Cook until favours marry and the scent dinner permeates all corners of your van.
Promise to never act badly again as the chilli comes to a boil.
Enjoy with last remnants of bread and criminally obtained cheese.
Bask in the glory that is this improvised meal for days and days.